I got The Call this morning - well, it was more like The Yell - CLEAN YOUR ROOM.
I don't know about you, my fellow bloggee snoggees, but that is just an invitation to close the door and have some fun!
It's like a massive treasure hunt through gross stuff (which - let's face it - is MY gross stuff and nobody else's) and the payoff is huge! I swear I found 64 pennies and my favorite Doctor Who DVD. I think I found an ancient iPod Shuffle too, though it had a bit of gunk around it that must've built up over the centuries, and someone around here is gonna pay me big bucks for the earring and the lost shoe. Okay, so maybe somebody else might've been leaving their stuff in here, though I bet I put them down absently while I was on my way to returning them to their rightful owner's room. Yeah. That'll be it. One of those times when I got distracted by the Snood game on my laptop and, you know, just dropped everything.
Anyway, all this to tell you that I found a few old notebooks with some awesomeliness brillo first lines scrawled in them - and some not-so-much.
It's my thing. I like coming up with beginnings. Course, some of them have got middles and ends, too, but mostly NOT.
So I'm gonna share some with you, my bloggee-snoggee pals!
How's this one:
'Anyone with the IQ of a mollusc would have seen right from the start that teaching me how to control my mind and safely handle my brainpower was a risky business.
'It's all very well planning for your future but you have to have a future to plan for. Gan couldn't remember ever having a tomorrow guaranteed.'
'I have secrets, and not secrets that want to bust out and spread themselves all over the lunchroom either. It’d be fine to have those kinds of juicy gems. I wouldn’t mind battling with the urge to spill that Zoe is crushing on Jordan or that Tam ‘s knicker elastic broke in gym. Not that I’d be party to those kinds of giddy revelations. No, my secrets are my own and, frankly, I’d rather they were someone elses.'
'From the first moment Ms. Goose and I arrived at the cottage on Podsmeer Common (in the Land of the Terminally Mud-minded), Cheshire, England, Earth, I suspected Ms. Goose was not going to adjust well to living with me. As soon as I flung the door open, she gasped, and several seconds later she uttered, her voice croaky with emotion, “How could you live in this . . . this squalor?” '
"I can’t help regretting that there wasn’t a sign on the bedpost, pinned onto my shabby blue jumper or stuck into one of the pockets in my jeans draped over my bookshelf. I would have seen it. Especially if it had been written in scarlet, like it should have been. Great capital letters, blaring: ‘CAUTION, AUSMUS MARNEY, THE UNEXPECTED IS ABOUT TO HAPPEN - TONIGHT. WILD RIDE AHEAD. TAKE CLEAN UNDERWEAR.’
'Matt the Gnat, (Gnatty to Henry), was nearly twelve-years-old and going to school for the very first time. For three long, cruel days Gnat got it thrust in his face that his mom may have taught him plenty, but he knew nothing about school and its complicated booger network.
"Lolly Green was utterly unhappy, which was very unusual. She was also utterly filthy, which was not."
And ... I was in an interesting mood when I wrote this one:
"I'm going to be honest: boldly, explosively honest. Honest enough to shatter, rip and claw the breath out of their lungs, freeze their plum line and suck their hearts out their ears."
Now, I should bury these and see if I can't find my other fluffly slipper. All I know is that I need to get out of here or there'll be a search party sent in to mess with me.
So onward to the potato chips!
Oh! And did you see all those pretty MG Fantasy book covers over at The Enchanted Inkpot?
I think Stefan Bachmann's The Peculiar And his equally splendid, The Whatnot are two of the best book covers e.v.e.r. What's inside is pretty darn good, too.
Choggers for now my dear blogger-snoggers!